Grown-Ass Friendships

Welcome back to the wonderful world of Sunday, where you get to contemplate the life choices that led you to check work emails and start/continue projects while other people in the other parts of this world have a day off. Isn't it grand? It’s like the weekend we just passed had one last punchline, and it’s a groaner. Today, I've quite a bit on my mind. Don't doze off yet.

But first, a little story. I had one of those bizarre chance encounters at the local supermarket yesterday- you know, the kind where the universe decides to throw you a curveball just to see if you’re paying attention. I ran into a long-forgotten school friend, whom I haven't seen in 30 years! And by "friend," I mean someone I secretly hated but pretended to like because, hey, I needed to sit with someone at lunch. They had this uncanny ability to make me feel like I’d forgotten to do my homework, even if there was no homework. There they were, standing in the cereal aisle, deciding between Kellog's Frosties and existential dread.

We exchanged the usual pleasantries- you know, the "Oh wow, it’s been ages!" and "How are you?" .. which is just code for "Let’s see if we still hate each other." Turns out, they’re now into organic farming and yoga. Because of course, they are. And me? I’m still trying to figure out how to make great friends in this adult mess we call life.

Ever noticed how adulthood turns friendship into a game of social Twister, minus the fun and flexibility? When we were kids, making friends was as easy as trading Pokemon cards. We were all shoved into the same educational blender, enduring identical brain-numbing lessons. Bonding was inevitable. I mean, who couldn’t relate to the universal pain of another mindless math class?

But then adulthood just slaps you across the face with a reality check. Suddenly, we're all in this leaky boat called "entry-level jobs," meeting up for drinks to complain about Superhero Spreadsheet co-workers who think they're the next Steve Jobs. We try to impress each other with newfound hobbies like gardening (because plants don't talk back) or getting swole at the gym (to impress someone we'll never see again after today). And don't get me started on those who've taken up knitting as if it's the next extreme sport. But let’s be real: most of the time, we’re just circling the same nostalgic drain, reminiscing about the ‘good old days’ like they’re some lost holy grail.

Then life decides to shake things up. Meetups dwindle to a trickle, friends tie the knot, spawn some mini-me’s or adopt fur-babies, and disappear into the black hole of parenthood. Others become career-obsessed work zombies, convinced their job is the linchpin holding the universe together. And some brave (or maybe just crazy brave) souls dive headfirst into starting their own businesses, like adopting the neediest, tantrum-throwing child ever.

So? What all this about? I feel, adulthood comes with a fine print that says "friends not guaranteed." It’s not because of some dramatic falling out; it's just that our paths diverge faster than a GPS glitch in our downtown musherib. Loneliness creeps in like a silent fart in an elevator, especially if you haven't mastered the art of making new pals. And let me tell you, making friends as a grown-up is like convincing a cat to take a bubble bath -possible, but it requires more luck than a leprechaun convention.

Now, I did start to make friends at work- emphasis on "start." But with everyone playing musical chairs with their careers, good luck keeping a steady group of pals for more than a hot second.. Outside of work, I turned to google, in a desperate bid to find someone who could hold a conversation longer than a TikTok video. Spoiler alert: swiping right on those apps doesn’t magically conjure friends out of thin air.

After much soul-searching (and a few awkward meetups), I discovered the secret formula to adult friendship: community and purpose. Finding my tribe of lovable weirdos was no small feat. Some people stumble upon their communities effortlessly, like tripping over a rock. For me, it was an epic quest. I stumbled upon them at a collectibles exhibition, where I felt like a fish out of water surrounded by die-hard collectors debating the merits of vintage action figures versus new releases.

Despite the initial awkwardness and a few gatekeepers who guarded their knowledge like Smaug with his gold, I found a community that embraced my quirks and shared my passion for geeky treasures. They didn’t judge my limited knowledge of DC comic edition Batman collections or my tendency to geek out over obscure anime references from back in Art college days. Instead, they high-fived me for it.

As for my old school friends? They're like distant constellations in my rearview mirror. Maybe our paths will cross again someday, maybe they won’t. Life’s a journey, and sometimes you need to switch gears and find new pit stops along the way. Who knows, maybe one day we’ll laugh about quadratic equations over beers, but until then, I’ll be here, navigating adulthood's friendship maze like a boss- albeit knowing that sometimes, the universe has its own funny plans.